Full Stop moments affect all of us during our lives. The Full Stop moment I’m sharing today affected our whole family.
In 2005, I became pregnant with our third child, and we were over the moon with excitement. I’d always wanted one more child to complete our family. At the 15-week mark of the pregnancy, while having my scan, the sonographer kept measuring the thickness of my baby’s neck. I became worried because I knew this was a marker for Down syndrome. I knew this because of my friend Tina because she has a daughter with Down syndrome. As our friendship grew, I’d asked her many questions about Down syndrome, including things that can be picked up to determine whether or not a child would be born with it. I had also asked her what it was like to get a post-natal diagnosis, and because of her answer, I thought that if it were something that came up, I would want to know.
The sonographer couldn’t tell me if he thought my baby had Down syndrome, and the only way to get a diagnosis back then was to have a second opinion and an amniocentesis. So that is what we decided to do. The obstetrician I saw rushed the results through because of how far along I was with the pregnancy, and we received the news the following day. When the words came out of his mouth, even though I was half expecting it, we were still in shock and went through all of the rollercoaster emotions that come with receiving such news. We also discovered we were having another boy. The good thing about getting the diagnosis then was that we could start learning and finding out what was needed for our child. I joined a support group and had everything I needed for him booked, and I felt on top of the world. I was gaining confidence through the other mums I’d met, and all of us as a family were excited for him to join our family.
My son is now 18, and he is an amazing person who teaches us so many lessons, including the true meaning of inclusion and acceptance of others. He has taught us that it’s okay if it doesn’t work the first time because we can try again. He has taught us patience, and he is the glue that keeps our family grounded. He has made us better people because of who he is. There was no stopping once we discovered he has Down syndrome, and we keep learning and growing each and every day.
Julie Fisher